Absolutely gutwrenching piece, had this saved for the time when I was in the right position to read it, and today was finally that day. Thanks for sharing this, I'm sure it was cathartic. Good practical advice as well.
So many comments come to mind. First, agree with above on caregiver fatigue - not only recognize as a condition but give people ample time and compensation systemically to take on these roles (something things aren’t just cut and dried - the roles progress at the pace of illness and need). Second, “Historically I’ve had an “it’s better not to really know what the heck is going on” policy for my own health” resonates - I’m so into wellness but avoid the scary parts (over 50; family history). Third, thank you - sharing this brings your Mom forward as a person and it helps as we deal with these incremental losses. Much appreciated insights for my own journey. Kind of you to walk through this out loud
Ben, if you hope for the best but prepare for the best then worst will happen. While I know you wrote this piece like all the others that you write from a good place, there are major red flags in here from energy perspective. It can see that you sympathize with people who suffer of age and the have great regard for caregivers, your underlying belief that similar diasease can be your fate too as you age because people in your family had it will cause you to attract this reality in your life. Requesting you to immediately get an energy cleanse done and work on your mindset shift to attract a better physical reality for yourself.
Thank you for sharing this personal story so openly. It helps everyone put things into perspective when we remember we’re all fighting against the clock, and there are no guarantees our later years will be good ones.
This is a great counterpoint to the recent attention on CEOs declaring that work-life balance is for wimps. I can’t imagine those 100-hour-per-week warriors will have as loving a family around them to care for them when they will need it most, nor will their millions be much comfort when they’re in a long term care facility that doesn’t have VIP suites… In the end, friends and family who will stay with us when things get hard are the true testament of a life well-lived. It sounds like your mother is surrounded by love, which is all that matters.
Thanks for sharing Ben, I lost my dad in May and the whole process is brutal. I highly recommend "A grief observed" by C. S. Lewis - I found it to be a great read.
Wishing you the best throughout your journey, lean on those around you!
Ben, my heart really goes out to you and your family. Thank you for posting about your thoughts and reflections. It takes courage to be transparent and put personal stories out there. Many resonated with me (particularly the disgust at the longevity trend considering all that's happening around the world), and I think about planning for my own family and parents often - though it's hard to face it and take action. Sending you and your family strength, and thanks again for sharing.
This really resonated with me, as I have organised care for my mum, who has Alzheimer's, and my aunt, who suffered a stroke, leaving her unable to walk or talk. Both lived rurally a long way from relatives, which has really changed my perspective on where I will retire to.
It also inspired me to get my affairs in order and made me think how I want to live my life. I agree that striking the right balance is challenging, from the level of health and fitness you commit to, to the amount of money you spend now versus saving for the future.
Wishing you and your family well in this really hard time.
Absolutely gutwrenching piece, had this saved for the time when I was in the right position to read it, and today was finally that day. Thanks for sharing this, I'm sure it was cathartic. Good practical advice as well.
So many comments come to mind. First, agree with above on caregiver fatigue - not only recognize as a condition but give people ample time and compensation systemically to take on these roles (something things aren’t just cut and dried - the roles progress at the pace of illness and need). Second, “Historically I’ve had an “it’s better not to really know what the heck is going on” policy for my own health” resonates - I’m so into wellness but avoid the scary parts (over 50; family history). Third, thank you - sharing this brings your Mom forward as a person and it helps as we deal with these incremental losses. Much appreciated insights for my own journey. Kind of you to walk through this out loud
Thank you for sharing. Caregiver fatigue is very real, and will hopefully be recognised as an actual condition soon.
I was not expecting to see this in my inbox today morning, but it reminded me to cherish my time remaining with my elderly parents.
All the best, and hope all goes well with you and your family.
Ben , thanks for sharing. Really resonates.
Sending good vibes.
This is a beautiful, heartbreaking piece. And it's exactly what I needed to read. Thank you for this wake up call.
Ben, if you hope for the best but prepare for the best then worst will happen. While I know you wrote this piece like all the others that you write from a good place, there are major red flags in here from energy perspective. It can see that you sympathize with people who suffer of age and the have great regard for caregivers, your underlying belief that similar diasease can be your fate too as you age because people in your family had it will cause you to attract this reality in your life. Requesting you to immediately get an energy cleanse done and work on your mindset shift to attract a better physical reality for yourself.
❤️🙏🏼
Thank you for sharing this personal story so openly. It helps everyone put things into perspective when we remember we’re all fighting against the clock, and there are no guarantees our later years will be good ones.
This is a great counterpoint to the recent attention on CEOs declaring that work-life balance is for wimps. I can’t imagine those 100-hour-per-week warriors will have as loving a family around them to care for them when they will need it most, nor will their millions be much comfort when they’re in a long term care facility that doesn’t have VIP suites… In the end, friends and family who will stay with us when things get hard are the true testament of a life well-lived. It sounds like your mother is surrounded by love, which is all that matters.
Thanks for sharing Ben, I lost my dad in May and the whole process is brutal. I highly recommend "A grief observed" by C. S. Lewis - I found it to be a great read.
Wishing you the best throughout your journey, lean on those around you!
All the best.
Thanks for sharing Ben. Really glad I read this. You're giving me a lot to think about. Sending + vibes to you and the fam <3
Ben, my heart really goes out to you and your family. Thank you for posting about your thoughts and reflections. It takes courage to be transparent and put personal stories out there. Many resonated with me (particularly the disgust at the longevity trend considering all that's happening around the world), and I think about planning for my own family and parents often - though it's hard to face it and take action. Sending you and your family strength, and thanks again for sharing.
This really resonated with me, as I have organised care for my mum, who has Alzheimer's, and my aunt, who suffered a stroke, leaving her unable to walk or talk. Both lived rurally a long way from relatives, which has really changed my perspective on where I will retire to.
It also inspired me to get my affairs in order and made me think how I want to live my life. I agree that striking the right balance is challenging, from the level of health and fitness you commit to, to the amount of money you spend now versus saving for the future.
Wishing you and your family well in this really hard time.
Thanks Alice, best of luck with everything!
Really appreciated this. Thanks for sharing. All the best to you and your family through these very difficult life challenges.
Thanks Karl.
Very touching